Unimaginable Sorrow and an Unchanging God

Yesterday was a sad day. I attended the funeral of a 5-week-old baby girl who was the third daughter of some friends at church.

It’s not the first time I’ve known of the death of a child. Whether it’s expected, such as the baby born with a birth defect or a child ravaged by terminal brain cancer, or unexpected, as in the case of an auto accident or another sudden cause, the death of a child must be the most devastating life experience anyone can have. (This particular death was of the unexpected kind.)

Our pastor, Josh, reminded us at the funeral that death was not part of God’s original design. Death entered the world through sin – mankind’s rebellion against God. We try not to think about death too much, don’t we? When we do think about the death of an adult, we often comfort ourselves with the thought that he or she lived a full life. But Josh made the observation that when a child dies, we see a glimpse of death the way God sees it – that is, as unnatural.

But, as our pastor continued, God made a way for us to know him when he sent Jesus to come into the world, live a perfect life of obedience to the Father, and die on the cross for our sins. He did this in order that he would conquer death. As a result, those of us who receive him by faith, and little children who are not yet capable of doing so, are only passed over by the shadow of death, but then get to live eternal life with God.

I was freshly assured of this yesterday: God is real. He is not a fairy tale that we comfort ourselves with. You would have no doubt of it, had you been able to see the parents of this precious little girl yesterday. He was with them. It is supernatural to be able to endure this kind of loss with such an unwavering faith. They were indeed grieving, but they were also comforted by the hope that their daughter was with Jesus, and that because of their own faith in Jesus, that they would be reunited with her one day. On this sad day they were not bitter towards God, but instead wanted us to sing songs of worship to the loving God who creates all things and all people and who graciously offered his Son as a sacrifice for the sins of the world. We sang a song called “Blessed Be Your Name," written by Matt Redman, which was a song that Rob and I had sung at our wedding. It contains the verse

Blessed be your name
In the land that is plentiful,
Where your streams of abundance flow,
Blessed be your name.

followed by

Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering.
Though there’s pain in the offering,
Blessed be your name.

When we chose this song to sing at our wedding, our reason was that we didn’t want to simply be praising God’s name in times of joy and prosperity, but we wanted to have that faith, that vision, that understanding of God’s character that would enable us to still worship him in the future, when we would encounter inevitable times of suffering. God never changes, and he is deserving of our praise simply because of who he is. That is what these parents were doing yesterday. As they tearfully wished for more days with their little girl, they were still able to say,

You give and take away,
You give and take away.
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be your name.

The other hymn that they chose to sing at their daughter’s funeral was “It Is Well With My Soul”. This hymn was written by Horatio Spafford upon the loss of his four daughters in a shipwreck. It contains the verse:

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Oh Lord, haste the day when our faith shall be sight. My heart and prayers are with this young couple who never expected such a loss, but who have already spent years in a relationship with the real and living God who is compassionate and rich in mercy toward them, and who are still praising him for his goodness.